Growing to Love - A First Love Saga

I am a fanatic of this idea of romantic love. I always have. Prior to meeting my boyfriend, I’ve never had the pleasure of being in love. In fact it, our unconventional way of meeting didn’t start with love at first site. Our saga begins with the ability to grow to love.

Like most budding relationships in the 21st century, we met online. On our first date, I found him attractive. It wasn’t until after going on several other dates and spending time together that I decided that I liked him. Shortly after, we began dating and he asked me if I wanted to be in a mutually exclusive relationship.

It wasn’t until 3 months or so that he told me he loved me. It was the first time that someone expressed to me that they loved me….romantically. From that point on, things began to get complicated. I didn’t say it back. Surprisingly, he wasn’t offended or taken back. He told that when I was ready to say it, I could say it at anytime.As we began moving forward, I had to learn what it would mean to love him. It was not to say that I didn’t have strong feeling for him already, it meant that I needed to learn what love was for a lover. I’ve always knew what it meant to love my family, my friends, and I knew self-love; I just hadn’t learned romantic love.

After a couple of months, I finally utter the words ...“I love you”. I wasn’t just saying three words but rather I was saying to him that I trusted him. I was saying I love you for loving me, for who you are and who you will become. I knew I could trust him to continue to grow with me. For me, I was accepting someone, and making a space in my life to fit him. I giving him the ability to see me at my most vulnerable and I am trusting him to not abuse it. Now don’t get me wrong, it has not been all roses and walks in the park. We go to couples counseling, have open lines of communication, and we argue for understanding, not for low blows. We have definitely had our issues, but we mutually agree nothing is worth giving up on our relationship. This was my start of my first love and the beginning of our sage.